1. How does it feel to be the parent of your child?
It is a challenge everyday. My husband and I really celebrate the small successes Joshua has made this far with ADHD. There are days when we feel exhausted after a “rough” day; when Joshua has his episodes of probing us to get things his way or when we hear he got in a fight with another student in class and we need to pick up from school in the middle of working. It has also been difficult to attend social gatherings with Joshua at times because of his impulsive behavior and outbursts. But we manage. We have a great support system with the school with his IEP team, family members, and friends who are very understanding of Joshua and his condition. My husband, my other two children, and I are learning more about the disorder as we spend time with him and as we work with the school for his services.
2. How is your child developmentally the same or different from other children at the various ages?
When Joshua attended daycare at 4 years old, we were often told he seemed like any 4-year-old but more active and openly participated in one activity to another, at times too excessively. We thought he was just an active child, being a boy. But as the same behaviors continued to progress and worsen as he started elementary school, his teachers have suggested he get tested year after year. As he was getting older, Joshua’s social interaction with his peers was not getting any better, often leading to Joshua becoming aggressive with his peers and physically hitting other children on impulse to express his anger. His grades were not reflective of his intellect as well. He was a sharp child growing up, but he had trouble finishing classwork and performed very low on tests. Homework was always a battle, trying to get him to sit down and complete his assignments. We finally had him tested at 7 years old.
At a first glance, people will not expect Joshua to have any disability or condition. ADHD is an invisible handicap since it is mainly the dysfunction of the brain that prevents him from being a normal 9-year-old boy. He seems like any 9-year-old, but excessively sociable and easily distracted by his surroundings, and often speaks with scattered thoughts and comments.
3. What professionals/agencies do you deal with? What services are available to you and your child?
We primarily work with Joshua’s teachers and district counselor very closely for his individualized education plan (IEP). We meet every three months to monitor his progress in school. In between those meetings, we get progress reports from his teacher weekly on his behavior at school and academics. Outside of the school setting, we also gained a wealth of information about ADHD from our own research on the internet (ldonline.com, has been a family friendly website we refer to frequently).
4. How did you find out about the above services?
Joshua’s teachers and other school officials were very supportive throughout the process of getting Joshua tested. His teachers were the first individuals to provide additional services for Joshua’s behavior. Joshua’s teachers spent more time with him at school during the week, so their suggestions really mattered through the diagnosis process to providing Joshua the support he needed through his IEP. We are so grateful for their continued support.
5. What financial burden, if any, are you experiencing?
There is no major financial burden at this time, since Joshua is provided with an IEP and well supported through his school services. However, we are worried with the recent budget cuts in our school district that it will keep us from providing Joshua the support he needs at school. We are not sure what we plan to do if his services are cut, especially time with the school psychologist, but we are hopeful since his teachers have reassured that by law Joshua should be given some services for his condition.
6. What other information do you want to share?
I want every parent who has a child with ADHD that there is hope through the challenges they, we as parents of a child with ADHD face moment to moment with our child. My husband and I would strongly encourage other parents to be educated about the disorder. Our perspective of ADHD has drastically changed since we have been doing our own research. We began creating a safe environment for Joshua to express himself appropriately. We learned parenting techniques to know how to discipline Joshua through his episodes and we also learned to positively redirect negative behavior. Our new knowledge of ADHD has freed us from being guilty for the struggles Joshua faces in school and in social gatherings. I hope other parents will feel the same.
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